OCD and Body Responses: Understanding Arousal Non-Concordance

If you live with OCD, you may sometimes feel trapped by your own body. You notice a physical response you didn’t want, or you panic because you didn’t feel what you thought you should. These moments can set off a spiral of doubt:

• “If my body reacted, maybe I secretly wanted it.”
  

• “If I didn’t feel anything in my body, maybe I don’t really love them.”
  

For people with OCD, these fears can feel absolutely overwhelming. The sense of shame, disgust, and horror can be unbearable. But science tells a very different story. What you are experiencing has a name: arousal non-concordance.

What is Arousal Non-Concordance in OCD?

Arousal non-concordance is a scientific term that means your body’s reactions and your mind’s feelings don’t always match.

• Subjective arousal is what you feel emotionally (desire, closeness, attraction).
  

• Physiological arousal is what happens in your body automatically (changes in heart rate, warmth, or other physical sensations).
  

Sometimes these match. Sometimes they don’t. That mismatch is normal. It does not reveal hidden truths about who you are, what you want, or what you value.

Pavlov’s Dog and Automatic Body Responses

The Russian scientist Ivan Pavlov famously showed how dogs could be conditioned to salivate when a bell rang — even if no food was present. Their bodies responded automatically, without conscious thought or intent.

Our arousal system works in a similar way. The body can react to novelty, anxiety, attention, or even shock. Just because a reaction happens, it doesn’t mean you wanted it, or that it says anything about your true desires. It’s a reflex, not a reflection of your character.

Everyday Examples of Body Responses Not Matching Feelings

Have you ever had really awful news and found yourself smiling, laughing, or reacting in a way that felt completely wrong? Internally, you may have been horrified — yet your body gave off a response that didn’t match your feelings at all.

This is another example of non-concordance: when our outward or physical reactions don’t reflect our inner world. Just like with arousal, these mismatches are automatic. They don’t mean anything about your values, intentions, or who you are — they are simply quirks of how the human body works.

Intrusive Thoughts, OCD and Body Responses That Don’t Match

Sexual Orientation OCD (SO-OCD) and Intrusive Thoughts

One of the most distressing areas where this happens is in Sexual Orientation OCD (SO-OCD). This theme makes people question who they are attracted to — for example, fearing they might secretly be gay when they identify as straight, or the reverse.

SO-OCD can also include other intrusive doubts about attraction, including fears about being drawn to inappropriate or taboo subjects (sometimes referred to as “POCD” in online forums). For those experiencing it, this is not a passing curiosity — it feels absolutely terrifying, disgusting, and abhorrent, because it clashes so violently with their true values and sense of self.

In this state, people may notice a body response when a disturbing thought or image pops up. OCD then piles on with a cruel story: “See? My body reacted — that must mean I wanted it.”

Cognitive Distortion in OCD: Body Reasoning: This is a form of emotional reasoning — or what we might also call body reasoning. OCD convinces you that because you notice a sensation in your body, it must be meaningful. In truth, it’s just an automatic reaction.

But in reality, the body can react to stress, fear, novelty, or even the act of checking itself. Paying close attention to these sensations can also make them feel stronger. None of this is proof of attraction, desire, or hidden intent. It is simply how the body sometimes reacts automatically — like Pavlov’s dogs salivating at the sound of a bell, without any conscious choice involved.

Relationship OCD (ROCD) and Worries About Attraction

In Relationship OCD (ROCD), the opposite fear often shows up: “What if I don’t feel aroused with my partner? Does that mean I don’t love them? Does it mean I’m with the wrong person?”

But lack of arousal is influenced by many factors — tiredness, hormones, distraction, stress, medication, or simply focusing too hard. It does not mean lack of attraction or love. Again, the distress comes not from the lack of response itself, but from the meaning OCD attaches to it.

Research: Why Body Responses Don’t Equal Truth

Decades of research confirm that body reactions and feelings often don’t match — and that we cannot treat the body as a “truth detector.”

• Chivers et al. (2010): A large meta-analysis found that physical responses and felt desire often don’t line up, especially in women but also in men.

  
  

• Prause & Janssen (2006): Attention, anxiety, and emotions can all influence physical responses — even without desire.

  
  

• Meston & Buss (2007): Found that arousal can be triggered by many different factors, not always linked to attraction.

  
  

• National Research Council (2003): Concluded that polygraph (“lie detector”) tests are unreliable because they confuse stress or arousal with deception.

  
  

• American Psychological Association (2019): Warns that lie detectors measure arousal, not truth, and can wrongly label innocent people as deceptive.

  
  

• Iacono (2008): Showed that polygraph results are often inaccurate, especially when confessions are used as the “proof” of validity.

  
  

In short: whether in OCD or in a lie detector test, the same mistake happens. Automatic body reactions get treated as if they reveal hidden truths — when in reality, they don’t.

Your body is no better at detecting desire or love than a polygraph is at detecting lies.

The #MeToo Movement: Why Words Matter More Than Reflexes

The wider world has also recognised the importance of separating body responses from true feelings. During the #MeToo movement, many survivors shared how confusing and painful it was when their bodies reacted in unwanted situations.

Advocates reminded us to always listen to a person’s words — because consent and values are shown through choices, not through reflexive body responses.

This is just as true in OCD. Your values, words, and actions are what define you. Your body’s automatic reactions are just background noise.

How CBT Therapy for OCD and Body Responses Can Help

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), especially Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP), does not aim to “fix” arousal non-concordance. That’s not a problem to be solved — it’s simply part of how human bodies work.

What CBT does target is the cycle of doubt, fear, and compulsions that OCD builds on top of these body responses.

• Psychoeducation: Understanding that non-concordance is normal helps reduce shame and confusion.
  

• Acceptance: Therapy supports you in allowing these body reactions to happen without treating them as evidence for or against your values.
  

• Cognitive restructuring: Challenging the distorted belief that body responses are a “truth detector.”
  

• ERP: Practising sitting with intrusive thoughts without checking your body, testing yourself, or seeking reassurance.
  

The goal is not to eliminate non-concordance. The goal is to accept it as part of being human, while reducing the power OCD has to twist it into something frightening.

A Final Word for People Living with OCD

If you’re struggling with doubts about your body’s responses, please know this: you are not alone, and what you’re experiencing is something many people with OCD go through.

Arousal non-concordance is a normal human phenomenon, confirmed by research and recognised in wider society.

Your body’s automatic reactions do not define who you are, what you want, or whom you love. Like Pavlov’s dog salivating at the sound of a bell, sometimes the body just responds. That doesn’t make it meaningful.

What matters — in therapy, in love, and in life — is not fleeting body signals, but the choices, values and actions that reflect the real you.

References

• Chivers, M. L., Seto, M. C., Lalumière, M. L., Laan, E., & Grimbos, T. (2010). Agreement of self-reported and genital measures of sexual arousal in men and women: A meta-analysis. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 39(1), 5–56.

• Meston, C. M., & Buss, D. M. (2007). Why humans have sex. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 36(4), 477–507.

• Prause, N., & Janssen, E. (2006). Attentional and affective mechanisms of sexual arousal. In E. Janssen (Ed.), The Psychophysiology of Sex (pp. 197–222). Bloomington, IN: Indiana University Press.

• National Research Council. (2003). The Polygraph and Lie Detection. Washington, DC: National Academies Press.

• American Psychological Association. (2019). The truth about lie detectors (aka polygraph tests). Retrieved from https://www.apa.org/research/action/polygraph

• Iacono, W. G. (2008). Accuracy of polygraph techniques: Problems using confessions to determine validity. Physiology & Behavior, 95(1–2), 24–28.